A.S. Face 0600: Cynthia Ashley

Cynthia Ashley

Since I was 20 yrs old I felt something just wasn’t right.  I’ve been battling with my own mind never trusting what I was feeling was real.  I’ve kept a secret and lied to myself that the pain wasn’t there.  This is my testimonial.  Mine is a story of struggle, realization, and ultimately a newfound hope.  I have AS.  Ankylosing Spondylitis.  Learning of this for me has been the most amazing discovery.  I have finally put a name to the face I’ve been acquainted with for 16 years.   I’ve been experiencing inexplicable pain for so long and no doctors have been able to tell me what was causing it.  It made me feel like I was imagining everything and even sent me to the ER with panic attacks.   I was messed up for awhile there!  Anyway, difficult to diagnose and often mistaken for arthritis, this disease has been slowly stealing my life away.  But no longer.  Today I am celebrating. This thing, this pain in the ass (and everywhere else) thing finally has a name.  And because it is probably going to be with me for the rest of my life I will face it, I will embrace and  you better believe, I will make it!

breathe

You can’t see it but inside I’m suffering, I’m dying
outside I’m crying but trying.
Judge not for I am like you.  Not YOU but like you.
Some hide behind it, some take pride in it;
I chose to grow with it.  Like a slow tide I will just flow with it.
It’s no miracle. human strength is satiracle.
No mind games, it’s more like an inferno.
Stretching higher and higher until I’m looking down on that fire.
It is hell down there, suffocating and intoxicating.
But in the open there is a freedom.
It’s invigorating it’s rejuvenating and yes I can breathe.

– Poem written by Cynthia Ashley

A fellow proud supporter and fighter,
Cynthia Ashley
Colorado United States of America
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5 Responses to “A.S. Face 0600: Cynthia Ashley”

  1. Ding! Ding! ding! Ding! Congratulations Cynthia Ashley on being the 600th customer of FACE’s–come on down!!! Is that a chicken suit your dressed in? Janice, show Cynthia what she has won! I’d love to Monty, this “practical and sporty” car is the burned out hulk of a 1971 Ford Gremlin that was returned to us from FACE #400…but thats not all Monty, we also have an all expense paid weekend getaway to the Holiday Inn Express in sunny Tulsa Oklahoma generously donated by FACE #501…”

    Sorry Cynthia. It’s Sunday night, I’m tired, and it’s the best I could come up with before “hitting the couch.” Thanks for making Cookies dream come true. And thanks for making the rest of feel not so alone.

  2. Thanks for sharing your pretty face with us! Sending positive thoughts your way… Daryl

  3. Welcome Cynthia! I love to see positive people on here. Proud supporter & a fighter, is so awesome to hear from you. I’m vey happy that you found this wonderful website. There are so many incredible people here, who are caring, supportive, & fighters. I hope you get as much from this website as I do. I’m really happy, you have a very special place here. Stay positive, stay strong, & stand tall!! It’s so great, you are #600 🙂 it’s nice to meet you, Cynthia. -Lisa #535

  4. Welcome indeed!
    Jacquie #377

  5. Dear Cynthia,
    Thank you so much for sharing your story with us.
    Sincerely Cookie

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